I sat in my office, text messages, emails, and phone calls frantically pouring in. I felt like I wanted to scream into a pillow, my head felt like it was in a vise. The phone sat on the desk in front of me, as if waiting for me to acknowledge its demands. A multi-million dollarContinueContinue reading “The Hidden Gift Under the ‘Chaos’”
Category Archives: Letters
Giving Away Our Power
When we strip away old beliefs, we create a dangerous void; one that’s easy to fill with new dogmas. But what if instead of rushing to fill it, we let our own experience be our guide? A personal essay on reclaiming spiritual sovereignty, one journal entry at a time.
What My Addiction Taught Me About Desire
The difference feels like strain versus reorientation. Willpower is me standing in front of the desire, trying to hold it back. This shift is me seeing past it, recognizing that the same energy can either be spent on the craving or directed toward what I actually want.
Philosophy and Fishsticks: Finding Ground in the Mystical
After years of chasing mystical truths through philosophy and introspection, one question kept circling back: how do I make it real? The answer arrived wrapped in the whimsy of Fishsticks. A podcast idea where high-flying ideas touch ground, where the abstract becomes audible and shareable. Where philosophy finally learns to breathe.
The Fear beneath the Fear
I had done so much work to stop fearing negative outcomes that I hadn’t noticed a more refined fear still living underneath: the fear of not getting the outcome I preferred. I was no longer clinging to catastrophe, but I was still clinging to authorship.
A Short Lifetime as Storm
As the wind gusted, I felt something within me shifting along with it. As the thunder cracked, I felt the sound waves reverberate from deep inside. As the rain danced, I felt a calm electricity ignite. I had become one with the storm somehow. All that existed was the storm.
Between Dreams and Waking
There is no such thing as fiction. Stories are a rich tapestry woven together by our dreams, inner worlds, experiences, love, and loss. They are not mere words to entertain. They are our keys to the real world. The world inside us.
Bound, Chained, and Confused
I tried something new; some ‘tough love.’ Kind, respectful, supportive, but also stern and final. I felt like it was working. But no…she stayed home again. Frustration rose up in me. I tried to feel it without letting it rule me.
Saturn Conj. Neptune: A Journey of Rigidity and Flow into Creation
Structure without feeling becomes poison, feeling without structure becomes distortion, but together they become cultivation. I spent years living like a Vulcan, valuing logic above all. But what I discovered through embracing creativity and flow alongside my need for order was something entirely new. A technology of consciousness exploration.
Detached Compassion
By taking on her worry and concern, am I not just amplifying it? Real support isn’t anxious concern. It’s detached, loving compassion. She would be better served by my stepping back and trusting that there’s a reason for this drama in her life, the same as I’ve learned to be true in my own.